No willpower? No problem.

How many Mondays have you dedicated to the pursuit of weight loss or physical fitness, and everything goes along just fine until Tuesday when the stresses of the day send you headlong into a pint of your favourite stress reliever—whether that be at the local bar or in your freezer as chocolate mint chip ice cream? How many times has that indulgence marked the end of your attempt to improve your health? There is no doubt about it: change is hard, but with the right attitude, it is possible.

You might think that your previous failures with your health goals are because you lack the elusive “willpower” that seems to come so easily to others, but willpower has very little to do with the choices that you make. We all tend to follow the same path that we have always followed, making the same choices that we have always made. And frankly, how can you possibly be expected to make different choices in your life when you don’t know and understand all of your options?

Experts suggest that we should throw out our attachment to willpower and instead focus our energy on developing “skill-power”. Reading this magazine is a good first step. Next, flip to the back and see if there are any courses in your area that would interest you. Commit to learning about the multitude of options that surround you. If you don’t like jogging, don’t jog. Try martial arts, or dance, or swimming instead. If you always eat when you are stressed, find out what else is available to you to help you cope with your stresses. Meditation, yoga and volunteering are activities that have worked for others. Rather than focusing on the problem area in your life, focus on finding a solution that you will enjoy and will be able to incorporate into your life.

You also need to make sure that your life plan gets the same attention as other projects that fill your day. How many times have you heard from your human resources department that your goals should be specific, manageable and measurable? Why should your life be any different? Let’s assume that you want to lose some weight, and you have fifty pounds between you and your favourite pair of jeans. Well, your goal is specific, and it is also measurable. Now all you have to do is make it manageable. Since you didn’t gain the weight overnight it’s highly unlikely that you are going to lose it overnight, so find a manageable goal. Why don’t you aim for a pound per week? Now, I can hear the computer in your head quickly concluding that it will take you nearly a year to get there. That might not give you the instant gratification that you are looking for, but I’m betting that you’re more likely to make it if you tread slowly and reward yourself with a weekly loss of one pound.

Ease into change. Drink one less glass of wine today, or choose fruit over a chocolate bar. You’ll slowly start to feel better as you gradually alter your habits, and the way you will feel will motivate you to continue on your new path. Most importantly, remember that mistakes are part of the journey, and not the end of it. Forgive yourself, and get right back on the path where you left off. You know how to do it. You’ve got the skills!